hyperbole hilarity: the demonization of the plastic bag

I did a story a couple weeks ago about the GNWT preparing to give nearly every resident of the NWT a reusable shopping bag to try to curb plastic bag use.

Good idea, right? I don't think anyone would dispute that weaning ourselves away from plastic bag consumption is a good thing.

I did a little research while writing up the story, just to see what kind of opposition there is out there to the old plastic bag. I was overwhelmingly grateful to stumble upon www.reusablebags.com.

It is noble in hyperbole. Beautifully ridiculous in symbolism. Unintentional in comedy.

Each time you refresh the homepage, a different picture from the gallery pops up. And the pictures with their cutlines are some of my favourite things ever in the whole wide world.

The cutline on the photo below goes something like: Plastic bag blots out the sun.

Kind of dramatic, don't you think?

The cutline for the following picture is something like: Plastic bag spoils view of San Fransisco's Golden Gate Bridge.

Ah... the perfect picture. Now, I'll just click the button and... Oh, you little fucking plastic bag. Get out of here! Get on! Shoo! You ruined everything!

I love it! The website is so great. They completely demonize these troublemaking inanimate objects, like they are the scourge of the Earth, like some kind of evil footsoldier army sent out by plastic Hitler to wreak havoc on crappy photographers around the globe. They'd make you think the minute you left your home, a handful of plastic bags would sneak in and strangle and suffocate everyone you've ever loved.

These photos actually do the opposite for me. I kind of actually sympathize for the poor down-and-out bag, criticized and decried by all. These sad, aimless, anywhere-the-wind-blows vagabonds, that don't have a place on this planet.

They're called litter. Garbage. Trash. They're empty. They are stepped on. They are used by society and then tossed away.

A beach bum... What's a sad sack to do in this mixed-up world?

Next time you see a bag on the ground, give it a hand. Pick it up, ask how it's doing, and maybe buy it a coffee...